Six Of The Best
Saturday 19th April 2014
—Carshalton Athletic 0 Margate FC 6—
In my previous blog, I mentioned my hope that we’d finish the season with a flourish, but this performance & result were beyond my wildest dreams.
The day started well, when in time honoured fashion, I collected some sweets & a copy of FHM before meeting Dan at Broadstairs station.
Discussing all things football (apart from when we put a lot of concentration into coming up with who our top 5 celebrity crushes were – a good way to spend the morning!) we made our way up to Hartsdown Park, where we were greeted by Rick, Harvey, Steve, Dave & Chris Miles, & Michelle, amongst others. We also picked up Mark & Christian en-route, as well as Keith Lewis.
Before leaving, however, we had to wait a little while for Barry The Barber, and I can only apologise to the other minibus passengers regarding my joke about him cutting it fine!
We were on our way in no time at all though, and being in the company of Steve & Dan was a pleasure as always – Steve enlightening me about his time in Belgium, and Dan showing cat-like reflexes to grab my copy of FHM – I’d like to point out that this is only because he enjoys reading the articles (ahem)
The journey seemed to pass quite quickly, and once in Carshalton we passed a cafe called ‘The Broken Egg’ which I couldn’t resist remarking, sounded like a smashing place.
In a valiant attempt to spare the other passengers from my increasingly corny jokes, Dan began to serenade me & Steve with various ballads, ranging from Miley Cyrus to Elbow – an eclectic mixture to say the least!
Rick stopped off not long before the ground, as most of the passengers wanted to spend some time in a popular pub near the ground – my memory isn’t the best, but I believe it was called ‘The Hope’ – Chris & Wendy also spoke very highly of it, too.
At this point, Rick was bursting for the toilet (almost literally) but declined the kind offer of an empty bottle due to it not being big enough to fit his manhood in – Steve swiftly suggested dangling it out the window, but Rick bravely gritted his teeth and drove on to Colston Avenue – home of Carshalton Athletic.
Already relegated, Carshalton’s future seems bleak – their stadium was virtually falling apart, and a large absence of home fans was noticed – although this could be possibly due to a mixture of their plight & their megalomaniac owner, Paul Dipre.
As I did my usual tour of the ground, taking photos on my way (not that I’m sad or anything!) I noticed that a celebrity was in attendance for our game – none other than Albus Dumbledore, of Harry Potter fame!
Even more magical, were the sights of Ivesy, Sarah & Alex – not to mention Alan & Gareth, swiftly followed by Ryan – the latter two make a great team, & I was really impressed with their match report & the title of ‘Six-y Football’ – their article is proof that I’ve got a long way to go and a lot to learn in terms of sports journalism, and they really are an inspiration to me.
Another welcome sight was catching up with Jim – before noticing Dan managing to get served, after he had some troubles getting his antifreeze (aka WKD) here last season – the joy on his face really was worth seeing!
I was also lucky enough to catch up with Tony before the game, who mused that the Dumbledore lookalike could also be forgiven for being mistaken for Gandalf from Lord Of The Rings – a good point well made, and one I mused over as I walked with the travelling Margate faithful behind the goal, as we kicked off.
Carshalton fielded a very young looking team, and this was especially noticeable in the case of their goalkeeper, who could well have been mistaken for the mascot. Like all teenagers, he was a little surly and not the most talkative of chaps, but did have a questionable pair of stockings on.
Margate dominated proceedings early on, and Charles Ademeno, who I felt showed his best performance since signing for us, set up Jefferson Louis perfectly with a header across goal, but unfortunately Jeff snatched at the shot and it went into orbit.
This was rendered academic soon after, however – as the Margate attack went through the home side’s defence like a hot knife through butter, and after the keeper made two good parries from Charles Ademeno & Bods, Charlie Allen gave us the lead with a sliding finish.
Better still was to come for both Charlie and Margate, as he dinked past various defenders from the left wing, before hitting a shot that the Carshalton keeper could only parry into his own net – committing the cardinal sin of being beaten at his near post.
As Carshalton heads dropped, Margate showed no mercy, as a scintillating run from Ademeno was cynically halted as he was brought down in the area. Despite the Margate fans pleas for Charlie Allen to take it (for his hat-trick) Jefferson Louis stepped up & calmly despatched the penalty. 3-0 Margate, with less than half an hour gone.
It has to be said that the young keeper’s bottom lip was trembling at this point, and he looked on the verge of tears. Ivesy however took pity on him and informed him that his kicking was impressive, to which he sadly received no response.
Ademeno was proving to be a major thorn in Carshalton’s side, as after another great run, he sent over a cross which Jefferson gleefully headed home, just before half-time.
As we happily made our way towards the other goal, Dan made a prophetic remark about bringing Smallsy (aka Luke Medley) on – as with the Carshalton defence being shaky at best, he could well snatch his first goal for three years.
Nikki Bull made a great save at the start of the second half, & it wasn’t until the introduction of Adam Cash (replacing Mitchell Nelson) that we scored again – a superb cross from the young defender was glanced home by Jefferson Louis to complete his hat-trick.
Perhaps resting the sublime Ademeno for our Bank Holiday game against Cray Wanderers, Smallsy / Luke Medley was introduced not long after, and promptly served me a huge slice of humble pie, after crashing a superb volley past the helpless keeper to make it 6-0.
Henceforth, he will no longer be known as Smallsy, but simply Luke. In my excitement at Luke’s goal, I promptly messaged the Mini Shark Lads, to inform them of these latest developments.
Even more excitement was to come when Jack Sammoutis decided to pursue a one man vendetta against the beleaguered opposition defence, twisting & turning with sublime pieces of skill before hitting the bar.
I believe Carshalton are still trying to untangle their number 7, who looked remarkably like Harry Styles – sadly he didn’t respond to my serenade of ‘You Don’t Know You’re Beautiful’, but with my singing voice, I could hardly blame him.
By now, the keeper had even grown weary of this game, and was to be seen yawning loudly. For some reason, this inspired Ivesy & myself to indulge in a conversation of vintage sweets & drinks – I believe we’d got as far as Curly Wurly bars and Um Bongo drinks (or Kia Ora – the fruity sister of songstress Rita) before the Margate crowd serenaded our conquering heroes with yells of ‘Ole!’ at every pass.
As the final whistle went, we were overjoyed at the result – and Charles Ademeno in particular set some time aside to graciously applaud the travelling fans – although Jefferson got Man Of The Match, for his hat-trick – I have to admit I would have given the award to Charles, for a superb display throughout. Charlie Allen also impressed, with another excellent display at the centre of midfield.
The journey home was a satisfied & peaceful one, with highlights mainly coming from Dan being overcome with a fit of the giggles, and Steve offering all & sundry some snuff – which I must admit I’d never heard of before, until Michelle informed me that it was used in the 1950’s – although not smelling it up close, you did get the feeling that it’d be good for clearing the sinuses!
The result & performance were first class yesterday – although our opponents were very poor and an already relegated side, the effort and endeavour of our squad was truly admirable.
I’d also like to thank Rick & the other members of MISA once again for procuring a minibus – yet another enjoyable away day was had, with the best of company.
Sadly, owing to legal guidelines (the keeper was only 18) – there was no Away Day Keeper Arse-O-Meter for this game, although Dan very kindly took the time to provide a burger review.
Away Day Keeper Arse-O-Meter
Too young to rate – N /A
Dan’s Away Day Burger Review
“It was OK, the bun was nice but felt the burger could’ve been a bit better – 6 out of 10”
We move on to our last home game of the season against Cray, after which there will be a Presentations Awards ceremony, for both players & fans alike – this starts at 5:30 – I’m sure a good afternoon & night will be had by all!